Episode 21 | Reclaiming Your Personal Power with Brenda Bryan | The Unstoppable Mind Podcast with Mary Lou Rodriguez

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Episode References and Guest:

She is a kick ass Inspirational Speaker - The Diviner of Human Potential. As a Transformational Coach and Mastermind Facilitator, she support Women to unmask and nurture their genius, empowering them to live in the strength of their passion. Teaching through the -The Raise Your Voice Speakers Club, Badass Warriors Circle and The Wild Women and Magic Retreat as well as one-on-one coaching, workshops and stages around the country, I demonstrate authenticity, a warm-hearted humor with a deep wealth of knowledge of how important communication is to feminine power.   

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Transcript

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Lo unstoppables of the world, you're listening to the unstoppable mind podcast. And today you are in for a treat, because I am going to be interviewing the one, the only the amazing. Brenda, Brian, and she is going to be talking about how to reclaim your personal power. So stay tuned. Lo unstoppables of the world. Welcome to the unstoppable mind podcast. I'm your host, Mary Lou Rodriguez. And I'm so super excited because today I have a very special guest, I guess that has made such a big fucking impact in my life. And I'm truly grateful for the gift that she gave me of being able to see, see and hear my truth. And before I introduce her, I want to just share with you a little backstory. So who I'm talking about is the amazing, Brendan O'Brien. And if you didn't catch my podcast episode, episode number 19. Stop being a victim to your money circumstances. I refer to Brenda Bryan and I shared that Brenda Brian was the first person to ever tell me that I love being a fucking victim. And that was the truth. Although I didn't know it. It wasn't always conscious. Sometimes I got a little inkling, but it wasn't always conscious. So I'm here today to interview the amazing Brendan O'Brien I could just get teary, teary eyed right now because I'm so grateful. And I want before I introduce you, I want to tell you how amazing she is because she's a kick ass, inspirational speaker, the diviner of human potential. She's a transformational coach and a mastermind facilitator. She supports women to unmask and nurture their genius, empowering them to live in their strength of passion, teaching them the Raise Your Voice speakers club, teaching them through the Raise Your Voice speakers clubs. So the speakers club I talked a lot about that. Bad the badass warriors circle, the wild women and magical and the magic retreat. She also does one to one coaching workshops. And she speaks on stages all around the country, demonstrating authenticity, warm hearted humor, a deep wealth of knowledge, and how important communication is to the feminine power. She began working with her passion of building this type of community and supporting women in the early 1970s. graduating with a degree in communications, she became active in the women's movement. Through activism, she has acquired lasting skills in group processing, facilitation and leadership. She's facilitated rituals, she teaches people sacred art through drum making, and other creative works. For the past 45 years, she's continued to build her toolkit to support women empowerment. And I want to introduce you to Brenda, Brian. Welcome, Brenda, Oh, I'm so happy to be here. So great to see you and to see you thriving because that is that is the gift that you give the world is to show that all of us have the opportunity to change our circumstances and that we can thrive in the beingness of our soul, and that we can take that journey and that there's there is a way through the pain to come to a fuller place in ourselves. So you know, watching my clients grow like that is like that's what feeds my soul. That's why I do this work. So I'm happy that you and I have a chance to connect and kind of dig in a little bit about what that what that transformation really does and is and how we get there. Yes. And you so you, you just said there is a way through. And I want to talk to you about that. Because a lot of times and I know specifically for me, I was not conscious fully of how I was playing a victim to my life. And so share with me the way like what have you found for you to be the way through that Hello. The first thing you do as you begin to recognize that what's happening isn't the way you want it to be. And that we have to and I'm a dreamer and I've always been a dream and I believe that our ability to creatively do what we want to do and be who we want to be is in our power of I came out of the womb, believing that and it's not changed what the journey has been, though has been rather Rocky and smooth and and going down, going down a rough River and being not being sailing on a smooth seas, you know, because that's the journey of having a bellybutton. Yes, we're always on the green growing edge of becoming in that green growing edge means that there's challenges that we have to face in order for us to really step into the accountability and the responsibility of choosing who we want to be in that moment, as we face those challenges. And that's, that's what I believe is our work. It's not to suffer. And it's not to be a victim. And it's not to be told who we are it is to choose, consciously choose that we have power in any given situation, because we can actually take our God given Spirit given infinite power to say, what do I want here. And when we do that, then that's when we start to, to kind of grab things and say, This is ours to molded in the shape that I want to end it is pliable through how I think about it. And that is what we don't get is that in, in how we think about something and how we choose to feel about something, what we're doing is we're committing to making a mold for the life that we really want. And I've been doing that from a very early age and learning and learning more and more and more as I get older. And I'm always wiser. How, how my thinking and how my paradigms and how my unconscious mind is, is is playing out in in my present circumstances. And then what do I need to do to grab hope to kind of say, what is the dream? What is the what is my heart's desire here? What is what is it that I'm really passionate about? And is this? Is this taking me down the path of what I'm passionate about? Because if I'm not living in, you know, I'm not living to my heart's desire, I'm not fueling that. What am I feeling? Yeah. Oh, you said so much there. You said a lot. You talked about accountability and responsibility. You talked about choice, and how to choose how you want to feel. And then you talked about commitment being committed. And those are brilliant. Those are brilliant. And I love that so much. Because I really didn't understand what committed meant. Most people don't because because we're taught kind of a an escape, that there's an escape hatch to our life, that if only somebody else would do that for us. If only the world would change, I'd be okay. And this is the this is the reframe right, this is the reset that we're talking about when it comes to what part Am I playing in the way that this circumstances is impacting on me? So we have to be asking the question, right, we have to be asking the bigger question, what part Am I playing in this? And what am I willing to do to make it be different for me? Not for the world, not because somebody else needs it from you, but because your motivation, your instinctual willingness to actually come to the light of who you are. drives you to ask the questions and drives you to be in the rigor Yeah. Of Consciousness. Yes. Yes. Oh, my gosh. What part Am I playing in this? That's a big effing deal. Big, big deal. Big deal. Because until we recognize that we are not, we are not side liners, that and we're observing something, that we have a part in it and that we're contributing to it, whether it's to the positive to the negative, if we're not speaking up for somebody who's being bullied. If we're not, if we're not, we're not voting for for for for the quality of life we want then we're then we're sidelining and we're participating in that less than Yes. Yes. It's so good, because I used to say that if only the world would change. And I used to think, I used to think and it wasn't always conscious, but I used to think you know, I wish someone would save me because I I did not believe that. I still want that please. And then and then I kind of go get a grip because that 95 scent of the subconscious that has been so poured into us that that, that that, you know, like that somebody's going to save us that somebody's going to make it different for us. Can I tell the story? Because you know, I'm a storyteller? Yes, please. Back in the, in the early 70s, I had a life changing experience, you know, in the 70s women in the in the corporate world were really like, if they're for men's pleasures, I mean, everything was about, you know, them getting coffee, or getting using sexual pleasures or, or the butter, the joke and all that stuff. So. So during that time, I just got I got I got I got so sick of being told that I that I wasn't good enough. And I, you know, I just kind of went, Well, what am I going to do about this because I'm not going to stay here and accept this. So right about that the women's movement started. And I got totally entrenched in the women's world. And that's how I earned my living. That's how my life went, that's I built community, all that stuff. But there came a point after 16 years of working on the front line, you know, doing protests, doing legislation changes, doing all the things you were doing, where, where there was this awareness that that happened, which is like, we keep trying to change the outside world. But we're not doing anything about our own behalf behaviors, patterns or beliefs. And so I, I started to really wonder like, there has to be another way. And so at that time, this book fell off a shelf in the library literally fell off the shelf, literally hit me on the head, literally, working, working from the inside out by Sony Johnson. And I went, Okay, I'm because I'm one who accepts signs from the universe, however they come. It's quite often baseball bats and books on the head. That pattern has changed. We're grateful for that. But what happened was, as I began to understand that we did not have any of the inner resources, we needed to really love ourselves, to take responsibility for kind of like the the way that we wanted to feel about ourselves. And until we did that, really, we were not going to change the outer world for not for a hot minute. And that's when I went to after 16 years of working hard in my community and people I love dearly, and all the people I cared about, I said, I gotta go find a new way. And that's when I, that's when I went to California, I started this training around being a transformational coach, because it was apparent to me that without doing some of the inner growth work, none of the political actions, were actually going to have any real shift in the world. Because we weren't, we couldn't stand for that for for the truth of who we were. Wow. Wow. renda. Wow. So inner resources, I heard inner resources. Yeah. And that is that is like learning, learning. And, you know, just over I think, in the last five years, but when I started this work, the whole notion of self love and self respect, and no, no such word as radical self care, that was not even a combination of words, let alone a concept that we could actually embody. Because women, if they took care of themselves, they were selfish, and, and they were single minded, and who did they think they were, that's what was going on in the 70s and 80s, and 90s for women. And to be honest with you, it's not that much different. Now, although we've got we're coming into an opportunity where when each one of us says, Well, what what what, what can I do differently here? Right, when we can ask the question of ourselves, what do I need to do to show up for who I want to be not? I can't hand this over to anybody, nobody's gonna give it to me. In truth, nobody is. And so it's not until we ask that that deeper question that more meaningful question is, Who am I free of all of all of these of all these conditionings? And I don't think we have a clue at this point. Because I don't think any of this have not are can free ourselves of all the conditioning of who we're told to be as women, as professionals, as entrepreneurs, as whatever the story is, right? And so it's not until we actually are willing to be really in the question and the discovery of who am I free of this? Yeah, well, we start to be in begin to see new windows of opportunity because then we're saying to the infinite and the universe, I have more, start showing me how I'm going to access more beautiful, beautiful, new windows of opportunity. That is what I call living and possibility. Yeah, exactly. And but but we don't come from that normally that that's, that's a 1% of the population concept, right that we actually have choice of coming from who we really want to be. And that we, because we're think we have thinking minds, and that thinking mind can actually mold the life we really want. That's not common our thinking. That's right. That's not what a lot of people know. Right. And a lot of the books that promote that they they leave out major pieces of what that really what what that means to actually learn how to do that. Yeah, yeah, gosh, it's so good. I love this conversation so much. I love it so much, because I did not know that I was creating my external circumstances, I really didn't understand that it was and this is kind of what you're saying along the lines of, of, of doing the inner work transforming from the inside. Because I thought my circumstances I would, I didn't know this at the time, random, but I allowed my circumstances to dictate my patterns and my beliefs to continue to dictate how I thought how I felt about life, about money about business. And, and I'm so grateful. I'm so grateful that I've been able to pause and you were a big part of that pause. Two years ago, big part of that pause. And, and that's when I realized that I needed to turn within so that I could figure out what my inner resources were, who am I? Who do I want to be in this world? How do I want to show the fuck up? You know, in this world, like, how do I really want to feel about myself? Not about my circumstances. And as I started to do the inner work to change how I felt about myself in my life, my external circumstances started to change. No, how could that have been a witness to it? Oh, kidding. Yes. Talk about that for a second. I'm just gonna kind of want to I want to rewind just a smidgen. Because, because, because I think it's important. And what's important is is that when you came to me, you you you had all of the the the story was told right between your body language your your vocal quality, your your words, your attitude, the way you present it all of that was being presented that you that you were we're not in control of where you wanted to be. And there was a desire within you to be in control of where you wanted to be but but my coming at this from a kind of be gentle be easy because we had talked about your mother dying and and you know, me, your aunt and I being friends that we had this connection. And so we were kind of nurturing this thing along. And then there came this point where you made a call to me, and that call was kind of like, we're there was this window, there was a small window that I had and and as like, either I leaned into it, or I left you alone, and I was I'm not about leaving you alone, because I loved you enough to have you be angry with me or to think I was cruel or rude. Because quite often, I think people think that I'm going to hurt them somehow with my words, and I would never consciously with intent, hurt another human being by using my words against them. But what happened was is is I have a teacher you know, I'm I'm a Clinical Hypnotherapist. I have over 500 hours of hypnotherapy, right. So and that without skills, I don't, I don't talk about it a lot. And I use it a lot. And people don't even know I'm using it. So that's okay. But one of the things he taught me was that when you want to have an impact with somebody, you have to match the energy they're giving. Right? And the energy you would give me over that phone call was one of like, I'm really in my victimhood. I don't, I'm poor, I'm impoverished. I can't I don't have the time. I did it. Other people have money. You know, they have people supporting them where the you know, and I'm like, which is when I had to match your energy in order to put to crack the armor of the story. Yeah. Right. And that was my only intent was to craft the armor of the story so that you would kind of go on that couch for two weeks and cry because I have to have I had to do it myself. Right. Anything that you're done, I've done it and I've been on that couch you know, you know hot blubbering mess to be honest with you because because when our when we we push up against the paradigms that are trying to keep us safe by keeping us the same? Yeah, they're gonna die hard. You know, some people call it ego but it's a pattern of beliefs and habits in a and conditioning, that, that, that that that has us playing safe in the world in a way that is very uncomfortable in truth. But but but we know that we can be comfortable in our uncomfortableness. Yes, yes. And that's what that's what's so hard about some of the work that that I do with people is because they cannot understand that they're in a, they're in their discomfort. They're, they're safe. When I'm challenging an old asking them to step into another level, another level of awakening, the fear of that it can be so massively overwhelming, not that they go back into the cave, and stay there, they can stay there for another day, they can stay there for another 10 years. But at some point, because they are a person who is on an ever increasing spiral of becoming, they're going to be called to wake up no matter what. That drop in the bucket that I might give might be kind of dropped. Number one, it might be dropped 50, it might be dropped 500. Until, until the wake up call comes in. They're like, Oh, boom. And I've been in the room with people that went, Oh, now I get what you're saying I might have been working with them for a year, I might have been working with them for two years, they've been making changes, but stuck in a particular pattern that we were kind of getting closer to and getting closer to and getting closer to. Because the ego is going to do everything in its power to stay in control to keep us alive. Yeah. And God bless that ego because you know, to change, we really do have to stay alive. But the really, the other part of that is, is is is what we're thinking and doing for our highest good. Is it coming from our souls purpose? Or is it coming from an ego based need to control our lives? And that's, that's what we got to be in the question about is this is this for my highest good, right? Is this my soul calling me to step up and step into the purpose in which I am here. And that is that is that is our work right now. And as women that's our work more than ever before, it's always been in my mind our work. But we're you know, somewhere along the line, we're actually giving ourselves permission to use our power to use our voice to step into to the, to the, the fullness and richness of the resources that we bring to the table. And so with the work I do is to really support women in stepping more fully and more completely more wholly into that passion and desire of their heart to live the life they really want to because life is too short, not to be living in our passion. It's the truth. It's the truth. Beautiful, well said, I love I love, I love hearing you speak, I've forgotten how beautiful What a beautiful speaker you are and how lucky I was to be able to take the speaker's club from you. And, or with you. And it was such a fascinating, like experience for me all the way around, like being pushed outside of my comfort zone being you know, and that's that was me speaking on a stage as well as other women. And then just practicing the skill of being able to speak our truth. And I think that that's really what you really wanted for us is to be able to be our authentic selves and be able to use our voice to step outside of our comfort zone and grow in the way that we're being called to. Yes, and that mission hasn't changed. You know, we we've done some restructuring within the club, of course, because learning is part of the process and a new program together, you come with an idea and you see if the idea is going to work and so we are the club has been evolving and the women in there are doing amazing work in order to to come to a truth about their own voice. And that's what's exciting is when they're they stand into an authentic ownership of the work that they really want to do and the voice that they want to bring to that work. That is that is about them and about what their heart's desire is and and to have a safe place to practice. Yeah, learn and find the find the way to articulate what that passion is because that doesn't come in one round. You know it, it takes a lot of time to really figure out what's the truth of me. Yeah. And to have a safe place to to try it on and to exercise it and then and then to get feedback and because we give loving gentle feedback, but but that's what makes becoming kind of an impactful speaker valuable is because you get to really stand for the best in you and in the people in the club. Stand for the best in you. Yes. Beautiful, beautiful. I, I loved what you said about, you know, I didn't realize that you were being gentle and kind with me when I first joined the speakers. And I was really attached at that time to the story of my mom. And I was feeling absolutely, I was in so much pain because my mom had died, you know, she was in a coma for two years. And then, and then she passed and I was grieving I was in a lot of pain. I know that I know that I was. And I didn't realize that you were being extra sensitive to me because of the pain that I was experiencing. And I feel like honestly, when I had my little fit about not being able to afford the speaker's club, and I do want to say this the speaker's Club, which is very affordable. It's just my mentality at that. Everything was expensive for me. I mean, I had programming that I didn't even realize was like, around money. And so I've done a lot of work or with that as well. And when you told me what you told me, Brenda, you know the truth, the truth, that I was being a victim to my life. And yes, it did hurt. It really did. And yet, you match my energy. And it was one of the most impactful things that anybody has ever said to me. Thank you. Well, you called it in. So congratulations. You wanted that? You didn't know you wanted that. We weren't expecting that phone call to go that way. But that's, but that's that was kind of why it's hard to pick up the phone when you can't when to call me. For many people, it's because they know I'm not gonna let it ride. Yeah, not going to let the victim take over. We're not going to let the story be be there without pointing out that that that that that there is an unconsciousness that's happening that they're playing into. And you know, I never want to do it in a way that's harsh. But sometimes to match the energy, you just got to, you just got to lean in and and that's what I needed to do for you is to lean in, because you know, the power of you require that you step away from that story. Yeah, yes. Yes. And that was really the catalyst where I pressed pause on my life and the pandemic hit right at that time was right around that time. And so I decided I was going to turn inward, and I was going to look at my life, and I was going to look at how can I be responsible for my life? How can I be accountable for my life? Right? Well, and that's the question that needs to be asked, right? And, and you're never there and you're never done. Yeah, I'm gonna have to get that bumper sticker done here. That's my million dollar. Income, right? That, that that because there's so much unconscious training, unconscious bias, unconscious programming habits, beliefs, that are all interwoven and connected, that that we're, you know, we make a shift in one area, but then then something shows up in this other area, and we have to kind of, so that's the rigor I'm talking about is that you're never You're never done growing, and you're never done needing to look at what what kinds of, of, of paradigms or stories Am I in are still in play, that are holding me back from being in a millionaire mindset or are having, you know, X amount of clients and living this way that I really want to live. So until we're willing to kind of really notice what we're noticing and just kind of spend time looking at what we're feeling and examining is this thought I'm having an expansive thought or contracted thought. And they're like, like, what is it I'm thinking here and and because we go through so many of us live in default, we don't live by design. What happens is in that default, we just accept that Oh, poor me that's you know, I love the your voice you know, the your voice can't do that because they won't let me say who's who's today and who you asked me permission from. And that is a huge piece of, of what kind of learning the step into our power is about is is that we have to be really asking the question of who am I asking permission from to do this? And and what right do they Have to even have permission to give me anything like, what have I, what have I assigned them? In terms of the power I've given them and we innocuously say things like, well, they won't let me or I don't think I can do that, because it's never been done before. It's like, well, we didn't fly until somebody decided we could fly either. I mean, there's a lot that we didn't do before that is in our capacity to do because we're willing to actually create the the mindset that says, What do I need to do in order for this to happen? What else can I be doing? How can I take a step forward towards this happening? And so you know, I'm not I know, I've never considered myself a writer, I've stayed away from it. I'm segwayed, I'm segwaying. Now, no, I was just about to ask you about your book, it's going right in there now. So I, you know, it wasn't my intent to write a book. But what it was my intent to do was, first of all, because I'm an entrepreneur, I knew that I needed to, you know, engage in learning, you know, better writing skills, but because I'm dyslexic, you know, I've, I've stayed away from writing, it's really, really difficult for me, and I really hated being assigned writing tasks. I mean, when I was in college, I was in my fourth year, before I had to write a 500 word essay, in order to pass my English in college, it was my fourth year, that's I was able to procrastinate to that point, right. So where we're at now with technology, I'm able to, to use the technology to assist how I use my voice. And because I went through a particularly dynamic relationship opportunity. It presented lots of lots of opportunities for me to recognize kind of how I was showing up and what I what I wasn't doing, and showing off what I needed to do and showing up and, and the person I was with, would not let me actually process with her in any way is like, oh, okay, this is really different. Because, you know, I like processing things. And what I discovered was, is that, that was the biggest gift she could have given me was not to actually be there, because I had to go in and do the do the inner work that was required for me to do ownership of this. And that's really where the, where the book has, has manifested from, you know, I was listening to Elizabeth Gilbert's Big Magic, and one of the things that she said in there was, is, you know, create a spirit, you know, will drop an idea and in your in, in your, in your lap, and, and if you don't take action on it, it's going to drop it somewhere else. And so I was I'm, I am a creative, I love being creative, I do all kinds of things that are creative. languaging wasn't one of them. But I've always liked writing poetry, and then all of a sudden, these one liners would come in. And so I would just take my pick my phone and write it down. And sometimes the whole poem would come through, and sometimes it would be a line or two, or something would start a spark. And I would go back to it later. And so the next thing, you know, I've got this flurry of poems happening. And I'm like, Okay, this is this is good. And I started reading them around and people saying, well, you should put a book together. And it's like, well, I don't I don't know a book. And then the next thing you know, spirits saying, Yeah, but this is your, this is a way for you to reach a different audience with the work that you're doing. And that it'd be a way to kind of create some creature threads around the fact that I do follow spirit and I listened to spirit and spirit guides me all the time. And then I pay attention. And so this, this poetry book has, has, has made itself to, to, to material form from the ethers to material for over a two year period, I thought I was going to work with my, my flower photos, because I during the pandemic, I took a lot of photographs, and that was what kept me kind of sane. And but the photographs that got used in the book are all landscape photographs, they're all of the ocean or this or the sky, or the whatever, whatever, whatever. So there's, there's a picture with each poem. So so the book itself is really it's called inward and beyond transformation as a conscious choice. And I think the whole reason for talking about this in right now is is that we all have different ways in which we can go in and do our inner work and there's no one way or right way. But but but going in is the way and so the presentation I'm putting together Now is called stepping, stepping through the pain because we are we are always on the green growing edge. And that green growing edge has pain associated with it just like when a, when a baby is growing like their bones when they're growing, they're, they're crying all the time, right? Because their bones are stretching in their groin, and their muscles are stretching to reach the bone. And so in some ways, when we're looking to be conscious, evolutionary, evolving human beings, there's pain involved. And sometimes it's the pain of recognizing that we're not doing the work we need to do. And sometimes it's just the pains of learning the new task, or the new way it it doesn't really matter. But but we're not going to get through this life unless we go in and we look at what it is that needs our attention so that we can flourish and thrive in the world in a way that in coherence with the with the highest good. We are. I love it. I love it. So my book came last night. Oh, cool. I was like, that's what came from Amazon, I ordered the book, can you share with people how they can order the book? And I'll have the link also in the show notes. Okay, great. Well, the I would love it if people bought the book and did a review on Amazon, because what that'll do is that'll push it out to Amazon. And I know that people have issues with Amazon. But the reality is, is it's it's how people are functioning in the world. It's also in Barnes and Nobles, and it's in, it's in Walmart, and it's in target. So major, some major outlets have picked it up. I don't know what's happening in terms of the sales, but I am pushing it through Amazon because once it goes through Amazon anyway, and we get some reviews, what happens in I start to get pushed through them. And then I have an opportunity then to use it, of course, to get to book some speaking gigs, but also to make some money and it'd be great to, to have another avenue, but also to encourage people to, to look at kind of how creatively we can actually go through transformation. And the book is broken down into four sections. The first one is called the spark, which is you know, when you start a relationship, how juicy and lustful it is, and all the good stuff there. And then and then the next one is called the crash. No, it's called the cliff. That's when it starts to go wrong. And you're and you fell over. And next thing you know, you're on a deep dive going nowhere and you don't know when you're going to land. Right. So that's the next section. And then the section after that is called the work. Which is like when you actually look at like what happened here? What do I need to own? How do I how do I look at myself in this? How do I how do I love myself through this process of, of what happened here. And then the last part is called the healing which is really where where we step into what it is to actually step into the light of of loving yourself and who you are and accepting that this journey of becoming, there's always going to be there's going to be, you know, holes in the road because you know, that's, that's that's the nature of becoming. Yes, yes. Can you say the name of the book again? It's called inward and beyond. inward and beyond. Okay. Transformation is a conscious choice. It's so is it's so is and I really understand that now. Yeah. So Brenda, what would you? Or do you have any last words any last advice for somebody or last advice any anywhere words, for really helping, teaching, educating? You know, because I know I have a lot of women and a lot of men that follow me that are really in the process of becoming who they truly want to be. And that means standing in our power. Yeah. I think the biggest thing is, is that you have to notice what you're noticing, right? You have this to pay attention to what you're feeling what you're thinking, and what those those thoughts and those feelings are actually the results they're creating in your world. And you and you have to go back to kind of really being in the inquiry of like, what what I love here, right and I'm coming from generating a sense a sense of your own possibility by by spending time on really working on who you want to be come to a decision about about the quality of person you want to show up and the nature of the work that really nurtures and satisfies you create a dream worth your time and your effort. And when you put your time in on something that's worth your time and your effort, things feel good no matter no matter if there's challenges or not challenges because are always going to be there. But how we face them comes from that place of what what I love. Well, I'd love for this book to get done and get published. Well, what are what do I need to do to meet the challenges that came my way with that? And how can I how can I step into recognizing that that that the infant is working on my behalf. And that I am that my intelligence and the higher intelligence of the infant are working together in harmony for me to have this thing that I would love. And it's not until we step into that ownership and that we generate from that place where we start to understand our fullest potential. You know, and so when we step away from the victim, what we're really stepping into is coming from the soul's purpose, we know we're here to be part of, and that somebody will say, Well, I know what that is, I bet you if you sat for a minute, and you said, what, what, what nurtures me what feeds me, you would find 10 different things, that that start to fill up that bucket of what your soul is wanting from you. And 20 3050, right. And that is not a singular thing, but a quality of life that you want to participate in, that that energetically starts to attract to you, the people who want to share that quality of life. Fantastic. There's been so much gold in this conversation, Brenda, I'm truly grateful for your time and really, like, serious, I'm gonna go back and listen to this again, because you had so many incredible tips, and pointers on how to be your authentic self as you stand in your power. And I'm grateful to you. Yeah, appreciate it. And it's been fun. So if anybody's interested in participating in the Raise Your Voice speakers club, because you know that you need to step up to ownership of, of the power of who you are, then contact me just contact me through Brenda O'Brien at gmail.com. And we'll set up a, you know, discovery session. So I'm just talking about where you're at, and whether it's a fit or not, there's so many ways to move forward in creating the life you want. And I'm not attached to how you do it, but I am attached to you doing it because you are part of the change the worlds we're looking for. And we can't sit back anymore and hope that somebody else is going to do it for us we have to be the active ones changing the world and being change agents for the things that really matter to us and what we believe in the most so you know, there's there's so many ways for us to engage in healthy dialogue and healthy participation in coming from our heart's desire. So beautiful shaver who that would Yeah. I love it. I love it. I love it. Thank you again, Brenda, for being on the podcast for taking your time and for just sharing your your your passion and your truth and your purpose. And I love it. I love seeing you. Okay, everyone. So until the next time, go out there and live your unstoppable life. Thank you so much. I would love if you shared today's episode with your friends and loved ones. Please share it on your social media channels. And make sure to subscribe to the podcast. I believe that we are all here to help others. Together, we can help more people. I would be so grateful for a five star review. And I'm also grateful that you took the time to let me know how this podcast is helping you. If you want more transformational content, connect with me on Instagram at Mary Lou hypnotizes you and then go over and join my Facebook group, the unstoppable mind. Visit Mary Lou rodriguez.com For more information on my programs, and how to work with me until the next time. Go out there and live your unstoppable life